Workbook: 14 days of choosing yourself
A 14-day workbook: honest questions, conscious decisions and a daily practice of inner freedom.
Put down the rescuer role. Let's see what happens if you choose yourself every day.
Day 1
Other people's problems vs. your own wishes
When did you last drop your own plans for someone else's problems? How did you feel afterwards? What would you have done if you'd chosen yourself?
Describe it honestly, without self-censorship.
Day 2
Your personal boundaries
Recall a situation when your boundaries were crossed and you said nothing. Why did you act that way? How could you have protected yourself?
Where would you like to be braver?
Day 3
Your “yes” and “no”
How many times in the past 24 hours did you say “yes” out of politeness? What would have changed if you'd chosen “no”?
Write down one “no” you said for your own sake — and how it felt.
Day 4
The voice of your own self
Stop for 10 minutes and just listen to yourself: what do you want right now? Write these wishes down — without criticising or judging.
Did you allow yourself to do at least one of them?
Day 5
A comfort zone — yours or someone else's?
Recall a time when you did something only because “that's how it should be”. What did you actually want?
Write down how your state would change if you chose your own way.
Day 6
Praising yourself — with no expectations
Praise yourself for three things no one but you notices. Why is it so hard to acknowledge your small victories?
How do you feel when you celebrate your successes?
Day 7
The rescuer's burden
In which situations do you take responsibility for other people's feelings or actions? Who do you help, and why — even when nobody asked?
What happens if you let people solve their own problems?
Day 8
My energy — for myself
What takes up most of your energy? Choose one thing for yourself to enjoy today, without thinking about how it benefits others.
What did this practice change?
Day 9
Fear of disappointing others
Recall a time when you denied yourself something for fear of disappointing someone. What decision would you have made if you'd thought of yourself first?
How often is your fear not yours at all, but someone else's projection?
Day 10
Small choices — a big difference
Today, notice at least three moments when you choose yourself — even in small things. How did it affect your day?
Write down how it felt.
Day 11
A gift to yourself
Today, do something nice just for yourself. Not because it's useful, not for likes, but because you want to. How does your inner critic react?
How do you feel afterwards?
Day 12
Your wishes vs. “shoulds”
Write down five real wishes you often put off. Why don't you let yourself fulfil them?
Choose one and take a step towards it today.
Day 13
A role for others or a life for yourself?
Where do you live more for others than for yourself? In which areas would you like to change the balance?
What holds you back from choosing yourself?
Day 14
Two weeks in review: how have I changed?
Look back on these two weeks: what have you learned, what have you discovered about yourself? Where have you become freer, stronger, calmer?
Save your conclusions and choose what you'll take with you.
Final reflection
Answer 3 questions:
What new things did you understand about yourself by choosing yourself for these 14 days?
Which rescuing habits have you managed to let go of?
Who are you now, compared with the first day?
What new things did you understand about yourself by choosing yourself for these 14 days?
Which rescuing habits have you managed to let go of?
Who are you now, compared with the first day?